multiversallogs | i wrote this song while i was drunk

Entry tags:

i wrote this song while i was drunk

Who: Jae and you.
What: Sorting his head out, getting back to work.
Where: Various places around town, including bar hopping and slice of life activities in Creekside, at work at the Vault, Anarchy 99, and the radio station, and at a temple in Brock Marsh.
When: Over the next week.
Notes: Would you like to bump into Jae somewhere? Note the location/vague timeline in your tag and it shall be so.
Warnings: Unpleasant thoughts about rape culture, drug use.

In the aftermath of attempting to help Megan and his encounter with Hilmi, Jae has a difficult time processing the series of events as things that happened to him - because things haven't happened to him. Things happened to Megan. Sure, if you hit a vanity with a sledgehammer, it's not just the glass that's cracked, but he's still not the fucking mirror; Jae's reeling from the turbulence. So is everyone else who knows (well, maybe not Sonja) and everyone else who will know - and more people will react to what Jae did, and so on, and so on, like ripples, because every time anyone does something violent or cruel, the whole of their world feels it. Society didn't become soulless overnight. It took a hundred million weeks like these and now, even when people feel the backlash, they don't seem realize it.

It's normal.

(It's horrible.)

Jae buys a couple of tabs at the Vault before his shift and rolls all the way through it. If there's one thing he appreciates about Baedal, it's that so much more is perfectly legal (or at least, perfectly unregulated), and the ecstasy (or space ecstasy) he can get is pure, none of this shit cut with coke or speed like he had to worry about back at home. It's a good night for everybody, which is fortunate; it's always good when he works whether or not he uses any enchantments, but this week, he's not even letting his subconscious do anything - he feels like there's a great gaping wound somewhere intangible inside him, and the stitches keep splitting. He just doesn't want to bleed anymore.

While he's been made one of the floor staff family with ease at the Vault, his experiences at Anarchy 99 have been more - well. It caters to dwarven metal. Still, there's a fair amount of enthusiasm for his style ("Just put some more INXS on it"), and when one of the waitresses asks him what happened that one night with Hilmi (because he hasn't come back), he just shrugs. Jae isn't sure if he should be feel fortunate that she's the only one who noticed they walked out back together, but while some of the girls liked Hilmi, some of them really didn't, and she decides to interpret that shrug as him having done everybody a favor. The notion of it makes him uneasy - but it's not like he can correct her and not lie, so he just stays quiet, and thinks about the same thing he thought about that night. That if somebody comes to arrest him, he'll just go. The notion of being locked up is like a suffocating nightmare at the end of a long and dark hallway on his head, but what's even more terrifying is the idea of becoming the kind of person who wouldn't take responsibility for doing something awful. (He'll ask Ilde for Sonja's number, he decides. He'd rather apologize to her than the police, and he knows enough about the military to know speaking to someone's commanding officer is as good as.)

Too much liquor, long nights, and investing in a pill cutter; Jae almost feels human again, losing himself in work. The radio station is a hilarious disaster, but he likes his boss, as much of a lunatic as she is. That he's at the bottom of the ladder again makes him feel like even more a child, stumbling over himself and his magic and his emotions as he is in this strange place. But there, it's not as bad. He hits the bar across the way from his flat in Creekside, he buys groceries and a new pair of sunglasses, and then he comes home ("home") and lays on the floor and stares up at the ceiling and pretends his head spins because he's been drinking too much.

He doesn't sleep for two nights, and then spends the third up and reading the book that appeared in the arrival room with him. It's the first time he touched it since he shoved it in the back of his closet when he moved in. The next evening, he goes to one of Shada's temples in Brock Marsh, and doesn't do anything beside sit quietly in the back.

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Shrieky trudged sullenly through the streets of Brock Marsh, his hair and clothes soaked though, plastered flat against his skin by the odd smelling, somewhat polluted waters of the Gross Tar.

It had been inevitable, really. There wasn't ever a question of him not getting in the river, the question had always been when. The justification he'd eventually constructed was that despite the fact that he could no longer breathe under water, and despite the fact that his legs couldn't touch the bottom, and despite the fact that the river clearly contained many contaminants, and despite the fact that he wasn't certain that he could trust his legs to get him back out again... he really liked swimming.

Yes, he could have gone to a public pool, but experience had taught him that he had a tendency to be territorial about sharing water with people. The river was probably better, even if he hadn't dared to move away from the edge, and propelling himself through the water using was apparently an arduous task now. Eventually he'd abandoned the endeavor in disgust, and began the trudging, soggy journey which he was currently on, back towards the Valhalla Inn.

Passing in the opposite direction is Shrieky's sartorial mirror; Jae is very much not soaked, plastered, or odd-smelling, he's actually put together and tailored much more neatly and modernly than most people about town. Which is irrelevant, presently, except to note the curious contrast in appearances when he stops to watch the soggy figure trudge down the road, and then attempts to catch the other man's attention.

"Hey-" he doesn't have to speak very loud, voice as strong and almost bizarrely rich as it is- "Are you okay?"

Edited (noticed redundancy HOURS LATER... ) 2012-01-21 08:47 (UTC)

Jae's voice is distinctive, and immediately familiar to Shrieky thanks to their short exchange over the journals. He glances up at Jae quickly, and yes, it's certainly the man he spoke too about the rude girl and Vanadi. Being too young to have white hair is the mental mark that he'd made to distinguish this one from the others on the network, and seeing him in person only reinforces that impression.

"I'm okay. I was-- I went in the river." Shrieky's tone is a little cautious. He hadn't been entirely sure what to make of this person when they'd spoken over the network, and he doesn't feel any more certain of him in person, "You're the man with the white hair." He offers, a little obviously, before realising that this might not be too illuminating a statement, and quickly adding: "We've spoken on the CiD. I mean, we're Cohorts."

Huh. Jae's not sure if that slightly wary tone is directed at him personally, or if this guy is just up to something shady - though he quickly sets the latter aside; he'd seemed to be dealing with some major culture-clash, over the girl.

"Yeah, I remember." His smile is mild, easy-going. "I'm Jae. Somebody didn't push you in, did they?"

The smile and the recognition put Shrieky at ease somewhat, and he lifts his hand to wave away the question, "No, no of course not. I just wanted to practice my swimming, and as you may have noticed, I'm not particularly good with people."

He frowns, and reaches over to scratch his arm a little awkwardly, "Granted, I think next time I'll remove my clothes first."

"Maybe everyone else is just bad with you," he says easily, and peers at his clothes. "I don't think the river's meant for a lot of swimming, though..."

Jae can't actually remember the last time he's been swimming, in a pool or otherwise. (Hiss! Bare skin!) Hell, he's not sure if he'd be able to swim at all, anymore. Surely he went more as a kid.

"I think that is exactly the cause of my difficulties." He replies, somewhat morosely, "But be that as it may, it still means that I feel somewhat disinclined towards attempting to swim in potentially overcrowded bodies of water. The river was quiet, at least."

Quiet, and thick with pollution. It had all still been very strange to him, really. The taste of the water, the way it chilled his legs and ran between his toes, the experience of having to hold his breath if his head went under... none of it was anything like swimming had been back home. Shrieky glances at Jae, quickly taking in his carefully composed image. "How about you? What have you been doing?"

"Have you been to the beach?" He's thinking about the coves and tidepools further southwest; Jae's not one for swimming, but he's been down through the boardwalk, and has chatted with people about the area. (There's a wonderful tiki bar.)

"I was visiting a friend." Which isn't a total lie. He visited Ilde in Shada's temple - but he doesn't particularly want to tell anyone else about being there. Not yet. It's bad enough, the things that have already happened because of having magic. He wishes there was a 'slow the fuck down' button on all this. He crinkles his nose slightly. "Do you want to go change? It's kinda cold out."

Edited 2012-01-22 04:21 (UTC)

"There's a beach here? With the Ocean?" Shrieky's voice is suddenly intently fascinated. He's never seen the ocean, has no strong memories of ever being there, but spending years in a body of water no more than eight feet wide meant that hearing about the sea had ignited a sense of longing inside of him that he'd doubted would ever be satisfied. "I've been trying to stay near the Inn, but I would like to see the beach."

He nods politely in response to Jae mentioning that he's been visiting a friend, and doesn't pry for more information. Right now he's still far too fixated on the idea of going to the beach to really feign interest in other people. "I don't feel too cold. Would you show me where the beach is instead?"

Yes, more swimming, that was what this day needed.

"Uh- okay." Wow, this guy sure is enthusiastic. Jae's not totally sold on the idea of swimming... in the ocean... at this hour... but saying no makes him think buddy here would just go look for it anyway, but himself. And he seems like he could use some supervision. (Jae will just stand on the shore. He does not swim.)

"It's on the west side of the city, it's pretty big. Part of it's a harbor but there's places people go swimming at."

Shrieky's expression veers across into one of abject pleasure as Jae agrees to show him, "Excellent! I'm actually not entirely certain which direction is West, but you could lead the way?"

He gestures vaguely to the street behind him, fully expecting them to set off on this vitally important exhibition right now this minute. It doesn't even occur to him that there could be some reason why swimming in the late evening might not be a wonderful idea.

"Well we'd have to take the train," he points out. "Do you have dry clothes? Or like, a towel?"

Slightly despairing. Shrieky, what are you. Help a guy out, here.

Shrieky hesitates at this, frowning ever so slightly, "Can one not ride the train in wet clothes?" He does have some back at the Valhalla Inn... along with all of his money, actually. Which he might need if they're going to ride on a train.

These thoughts manifest visibly, flickering across his face as he considers his priorities. After a moment, he reaches up to scratch the back of his head, frown deepening, "It may be better to go another day. Would you still show me where?"

"It's considered a little impolite, since you'd get water everywhere."

Jae's not sure what kind of mentor he'd be concerning adjustment to modern life - he's a little skittish about the city still, too. (And he's not sure why this guy is so fixated on water.) "Sure. It's better during the day, too."

The beach isn't abandoned at night - he's been down there for fireside bars - but swimming in the dark? Not a good idea.

Well, that more or less made sense, even if it did seem irrationally touchy of people to have a problem with water of all things. Still, he nods understandingly, and turns back to the direction which he knows the Inn to be situated in, "Yes, I suppose most things are better in the day."

He takes a half step, then falters, as if realizing that walking off into the night at this point may make it difficult to actually find Jae again, "Is there... can I contact you through the CiD?"

"Sure." Jae's not sure if he should be entertained or concerned, so he chooses to be charmed. Just because.

Not really wanting to know whether or not Shrieky went river-diving with his CiD in his pocket, Jae pulls his wallet and a pen out of his jacket's chest pocket to write down his number. "I'm Jae, by the way. What's your name?"

(No, he's never escaping this question. Sorry bro.)

Shrieky frowns automatically when he sees Jae begin to write, but he doesn't actually come out and voice his concerns. If it's just one or two words he can probably piece together what it says later.

The frown deepens a little more at the question, because Jae had already said his name, and Shrieky had rather been hoping to evade having to ever respond in kind.

"Mermaid." He mumbled it a little, because maybe if Jae didn't hear it quite right he'd feel too embarrassed to try and say it, or to bring it up again.

He did already say his name, yes, but as he was not met with reciprocation, he assumed Shrieky had just glossed over it by accident in his enthusiasm for everything else. (Alas.) On the plus side, all he writes down his 'Jae' in English letters, and then the numbers below it. Not a whole lot of bother.

"Mermaid?" Jae blinks a little, and for a while he does consider asking him what the heck, but then decides not to. Maybe he really is a mermaid, seeing how disconnected he is from.. how anything works. He's seen weirder in Baedal already, and he knows they exist at home. Maybe they don't have names underwater...

"Where are you from?"

Curses! Even when mumbling he had clearly been too audible to avoid the name exchange! Shrieky frowns a little as Jae repeats the word, but nods, all the same. Yes, Mermaid.

The second question poses a new problem to him. He does know the name of the town, and of the castle that he grew up in, but he hasn't ever really identified himself as a part of the population of said town. After a moment, he commits to an answer, "I'm from a place called Casnewydd." He hesitates breifly, before deciding to add: "I lived in the moat there."

That... actually makes sense. So Jae just nods, and feels sympathetic. This must be even weirder for him - but he seems upbeat enough, culture clash aside. He hopes no one was very terrible to him at home.

"I think you'd like the beach," he says. "Um. Most people wear either no clothes in the water or special garments made for it, though. If you wander around in wet clothes like that, you can wreck the fibers after a while, or you'll catch a cold."

Maybe the cold thing isn't scientifically sound, but look, that thought is way too ingrained in humanity's head.

Edited (words are hard) 2012-01-24 23:41 (UTC)

"It seems unlikely that after living in cold water for decades, I would suddenly become susceptible to illnesses caused by low temperatures." Shrieky replies, his tone slightly miffed. Still, he tilts his head slightly, as he considers the rest of the warnings issued.

"It was fairly cumbersome attempting to swim in these." He acknowledges, glancing down at his sodden garments, before looking back up to Jae again. "Perhaps I'll try and find something more appropriate for when we go to the beach? What is it that you wear in the water?"

(Be miffed all you want, Shrieky, you've got feet now.)

"Well, for me personally I don't really like swimming," he begins, just.. getting that out there, in the event anyone tries to haul him underwater, "But people wear I live will wear bathing suits, like short pants and tops made out of material that doesn't get heavy like that. Most places will probably have at least a few little things."

Everyone should be introduced to neon Hawaiian print swim trunks. Yes.

Edited 2012-01-26 02:53 (UTC)

(He is vastly underestimating how much of a difference that will make to his cold resistance.)

"You don't like swimming?" Shrieky asks this as if he hadn't even considered the possibility that someone could think that this was an acceptable outlook to have, "How can you not like swimming? What don't you like about it?" He folds his arms, waiting for an explanation.

He is probably going to try and haul you underwater Jae. The pressure to come splash about with him will be on now until the end of time.

"I'm a little claustrophobic, and the feeling of being submerged in water freaks me out."

He sounds sheepish when he says it, because it's true - though not the complete issue; he also just hates being seen without all his clothes on. It's not body image issues (well, not really, he isn't enormously insecure, but he also doesn't think he's anyone's Adonis), but rather control and intimacy issues. It just wigs him out.

"I like being at the beach just fine."

Edited (WORDS WORDS WORDS) 2012-01-26 05:58 (UTC)

Shrieky's first instinct is to nay say on this and declare that being in water isn't claustrophobic or freaky, but he resists the urge. Reaching up, he rubs his eye a little uncomfortably, "Sometimes I feel the opposite of that now. As if there's far too much space and too many directions around me, here."

He drops his hand back down, and looks at Jae earnestly, "I mean, I do like it here? But it's quite overwhelming, so I suppose I can understand what your problem with it is."

Well, he couldn't understand the problem exactly, but he understood that moving from land to sea and vice versa was quite stressful.

Passing through Brock Marsh, some vague time after Jae is done in the temple there?

\o/

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