When you do not like to fight, change the rules.

[amberdrake]

Who: Amberdrake and Ilde
What: Ilde's been referred to Amberdrake for therapy, this is a first session.
Where: The old dojo in Howl Barrow
When: Present
Notes: Kestra'chern do kestra'chern things.
Warnings: Talk of suicide, mental illness, etc. It's a therapy session, yo.

Amberdrake rather misses having an assistant. He finishes straightening up one of the twin work-rooms from his last client, who wanted a hot stone and hammer massage and a debate, and takes a moment to re-center himself and relax.

Then he heads for the hallway, and beyond it the walkway, and beyond that, the red gate. He's still wiping faintly lavender-scented massage oil off his hands with a cloth while he waits, humming faintly to himself.

It's hard work, but it's good to be doing his own thing again! He can stop being a glorified spa-worker and get back to being a kestra'chern, and all the things that entails.

Like actually getting to talk to my clients. Even if he has to do it all without an assistant! But I managed fine on my own before Gesten stomped into my life, I can manage again.

Indeed. So here he waits, giving his shoulders an experimental roll as he wipes his hands off. He's in his full kestra'chern garb, complete with the little bells in his hair.

Comments

[amberdrake]

Drake covers her hand with his other one, although so lightly that it would be supremely easy to pull away. There is no grabbing, here, no curling of the fingers beyond what his tendons do naturally when relaxed.

"I think," and he is very intent about this point, which is what the hand thing is all about. One can nearly feel how firmly he believes this, "that because you worry about this, and to a lesser degree because you're willing to speak to a therapist -- who it is doesn't matter as much as that willingness -- that you will be a fine parent."

The sight of her eyes doesn't even register a blip on the reaction-dar; he already knows she's something not-human. And he knew when he first touched her hand that she was using some kind of illusion, since her skin doesn't feel the way it looks.

"No parent is perfect, trust me. Mine weren't, and I'm not, and in thirty years as a kestra'chern -- a therapist -- I've never known a single person with perfect parents. But I truly think you'll do more good than not, and that's what it really comes down to."

[rhinemaid]

Underneath the illusion, her eyes are bottomless dark - so blue as to appear black in almost all lights. Bigger, too, bigger than is the norm for humans. For now, though, she has Remy's eyes and the thought that maybe he would think this is a good idea, coming here. Maybe he would be a little bit proud of her, even. It'd be nice, if someone were proud of her.

“Worrying isn't enough on its own,” she says, because she'd got that far down the logic path all by herself - but she's here, isn't she. And it's good that she's here, isn't it. And if she isn't significantly less terrified of her own future, then at least the notion of coming here again doesn't feel completely crippling.

[amberdrake]

"True, worrying without action can make one complacent," the kestra'chern agrees, "and allow the very thing you were worrying about to happen, after all. But, you're doing more than just worrying, you're taking action."

And perhaps that's occurred to her, sure, but hearing someone else say it out loud can't hurt, can it? A total stranger is acknowledging her efforts, out loud.

[rhinemaid]

For someone so prone to looking outside of herself for validation - of many kinds - it's necessary, which is in and of itself something indicative of troubles that go all the way down to the bone. It's a first step, though, and coaxing her through taking it helps; she checks herself against the people around her, and to not find herself utterly lacking for once is no small thing.

She reminds herself, as if she could forget somehow, that it is just one step. She hasn't solved anything. Maybe she can't. Her father couldn't. What makes her think she can do better than he could? (Well, she successfully killed herself, he never managed that one, either-)

She tries not to think about what her mother might say, and instead says, “That's true.”

[amberdrake]

All things that kestra'chern are accustomed to. And a need they often fill.

"I think it was very brave of you to come here," Amberdrake risks giving her hand one small, harmless squeeze before releasing it, "I know it wasn't easy for you."

He picks his tea back up, giving his hands something to fiddle with. "I think we should concentrate on the present and the immediate future, for now, rather than the past or the far-off future. I know it is difficult, but there is nothing to be done about the past except learn from it, and the far future is mercurial. I am not suggesting that it be ignored, but to try to keep in mind that you are doing everything you can in the present, and that is the most anyone can ask for."