you wouldn't be so depressed if you really believed in god

[rhinemaid]

Who: Ilde Decima, Mycroft Holmes, Jim Kirk
What: Ilde and Mycroft read together.
Where: Queensgate & Winchester Memorial Park, Sobek Croix.
When: Sukkardi afternoon/eveningish?
Notes: Separate threads for Mycroft and Jim! If you would also like to run into Ilde while she's passing through Sobek Croix, drop me a line and we can probably make something happen. Also, obligatory polyvore.
Warnings: TBA if necessary.

Sobek Croix is an oddly soothing place to be, Ilde finds; passing through the forest always makes her feel as if she's getting away from something, somehow. An illusion that lets her pretend this is a different place when it isn't, not really, just this city's different face. It doesn't really matter - knowing that it's a comforting illusion doesn't undo its usefulness to her. She knows all about self-deception.

The way to Queensgate is a familiar route that she doesn't have to concentrate on too hard, turn here and follow this road and she can do it almost on autopilot, now, and that's how she's done most things for the past few weeks. Distracted and busy, she's let herself forget about everything that isn't one foot in front of the other or written on a list somewhere and nobody pencils in political unrest unless they're living a certain kind of life that she currently isn't. She feels a little bit like she's just waking up all over again, without direction outside the carefully mapped out path that isn't and can't be uninfluenced by what's happening in the world around her. It's like swinging between extremes; being a part of this city is what she wants, but not the wrong part, not the quiet, restless part that frustrated her so much when she first arrived, the people who look away and look through and just have better things to be doing with their time.

And not the part who think because she's started to show that they can touch her belly, either, because she's going to pin someone's hand to a table with a knife the next time that happens without her permission. At very least she'll consider it very hard, and maybe substitute something that she can't be charged with assault for. (Her students, at least the children, get a pass; their parents wouldn't if not for the fact that she needs that money.) A little violent fantasy- has probably hurt plenty of people, but keeps Ilde vaguely distracted on the rest of her walk through Sobek Croix to Mycroft's property, taking the scenic route through the memorial park just because she can.

She came out a little earlier just to make sure it wouldn't make her late. Punctuality is one of those other things she doesn't have any innate knack for, but if at first you don't succeed-

Comments

[diogenesis]

Mycroft breathes out a single humorless laugh, the faint force of the exhalation somehow propelling him further back into his armchair. The statement rings so deeply, horribly true that that single reaction is all that's left to him.

“I always thought myself someone who could get used to nothing,” he says. There's a long moment of quiet then, of him working over memories and elsewheres. Eventually he remembers his tea, and drinks some more of it, and then he goes back to the first part of Ilde's reply.

“I'd recommend staying inside this week,” he says, his affect illegible.

[rhinemaid]

“You and Ivan both. The week after the tower, he texted me almost on the hour when I wasn't in his sight-”

Ilde always sounds vaguely bewildered when she describes the care other people take; not as though she objects, just as though it's unexpected. And in Ivan's case, surreal in its domesticity.

“-anyway.” Not the point. On her mind, though, with the baby. “You're probably right. I just, I don't know. I don't like staying inside.” She doesn't like being in the midst of chaos, either, she just doesn't like doing nothing. There has to be a third option- she's just going to have to find out what it is.