"Shhh," Alan chides, setting down his fork and raising a finger to his mouth. It's not altogether serious--witness the lofted eyebrow, the hint of a smile even as he puckers his lips--but it's not altogether mocking, either.

"I'd never have done this at home," he confides (in appropriately hushed tones) a moment later, sparing the television a glance. "Too...conventional, I suppose. Now, though, I don't know that there is such a thing."